“Old age ain't no place for sissies.” .. Bette Davis

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  • My Life and Times

    I was born in 1939 BC.
    That’s ‘Before Computers’.

    Luckily I survived the following events in my life, such as

    World War II, The London Blitz, Rationing, and worst of all… Archbishop Temple’s School.




    During the mid 1950s I was enjoying Rock ‘n’ Roll and being a first generation teenager, when suddenly, just like Elvis, I found myself in uniform during ‘The Cold War’…and then




    I became ‘a family’. Which meant that I sort of missed the ‘swinging sixties’, but still managed to look a complete prat in the 70s, just like everyone else.




    During the ‘Thatcher Years’ I lost my hair and a lot of people lost a good deal more. My career fluctuated to say the least as I was demoted, promoted, fired and hired a number of times, but still I managed to stagger on into a welcome retirement and to celebrate 58 years of happy marriage.

  • February 2014
    M T W T F S S
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Archive for February, 2014

Obscene pay for a prima donna !

Posted by Big John on February 23, 2014

During the last few days we have had news on two very famous football (soccer) players. One was the great Tom Finney who has been, quite rightly, described at the news of his death as …“A true gentleman and an ambassador not just for football but for the City of Preston and indeed England as a whole. Sir Tom was and is a true football legend. His like will never be seen again.”

Sir Tom only ever played for one club and that was Preston North End in the days of long baggy shorts, thick woollen socks and big leather boots, and for much of the time he still worked as a plumber as there was a maximum limit on professional footballers’ pay.

The other player in the news at the moment is the snarling, swearing, spitting, half brained Neanderthal (my apologies to the Neanderthals) yob .. Wayne Rooney !

For much of Sir Tom’s career his wages were limited to just £20 per week (approx. £400 today): … and Wayne ?

Well, he now gets a little more, as his wages have just been increased to the staggering amount of …

…  £300,000 per week !


Posted in nostalgia, rant | 3 Comments »

I wonder if Jecca is a ‘hot’ shot ?

Posted by Big John on February 15, 2014

“Pass another sandbag, Willy”

“OK, Harry, but why are we doing this ?”

“Oh, some PR toady at the Palace thought that we needed a photo opportunity showing us helping the poor peasants who’s homes have been flooded, just like all those useless  politicians were shown last week poncing about in their wellies.”

“I suppose that it’s the same old story. You know, to counter our cock-ups they usually send us off to be photographed cuddling a starving African baby or visiting a children’s hospice.”

“So, what did we do this time ?”

“I think that it’s because we joined Daddy in signing up to help save endangered wildlife, like elephants and rhino, after we had just spent a few days shooting the shit out of half the wild boar and stags in Spain.”

“Never mind Willy, at least it’s not as bad as what happened to poor Daddy and Step-Mummy when the bloody plebs disapproved. They had to give up their jolly old …

… fox hunting!”

Posted in humour, rant | 4 Comments »

“Happy Days” … ?

Posted by Big John on February 11, 2014

Today is my 75th birthday, and I have to wonder, after all these years, how I managed to survive and enjoy my younger days in a world that today’s kids could not possibly imagine; for how would they fare without, what have become, the ‘basics’ of a modern life; for in my childhood there was.. NO

  • Television .. Just the BBC on the radio wireless.
  • Telephone .. The nearest one was two streets away on a shop counter.
  • Computer .. Great fun was had playing games in the street.
  • Motor car .. If a tram or bus didn’t go there, then, neither did I, unless I walked.
  • Bathroom .. A scrub in the kitchen sink or a tin bath by the fire.
  • Toilet paper ! .. I won’t go into detail.
  • Fast Food .. Only fish and chips. “Bring your own newspaper”.
  • Holidays .. Abroad ! Where was that ? .. Well, maybe a day by the sea.
  • Supermarket .. or “Can I scan your ration book?”
  • Refrigerator .. Only a daily walk to the shops by my mum.
  • Central heating .. Just open coal fires, even at school.
  • Shoes .. Oops ! .. No .. Sorry, I got carried away for a moment, so I’ll …

… give it a rest for now.

Perhaps I should give myself a birthday treat, with a longer trip down ‘memory lane’ ?

Well, perhaps not. It might put me off my …

… foie gras and Champagne.  😉

Posted in family, humour, nostalgia | 9 Comments »

“Making a Splash” !

Posted by Big John on February 8, 2014

There seem to be quite a few stories in the news at present about swimming: from freezing your naughty bits off by ‘winter swimming’, to teaching dogs to swim; and stopping the funding for the UK formation drowning synchronised swimming team. There are even thousands of people who waste part of every Saturday evening by watching ‘celebs’ dive into a swimming pool in the latest TV trash ‘reality show’.

Now let me say that I have never been too keen on swimming ever since I was a young child, and my father taught me to swim by taking me down to the local river and throwing me in !

Learning to swim was easy. The hard part was …

 … getting out of the sack !

Posted in family, humour, nostalgia | 4 Comments »