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I bet it’s a case of … “One hand giveth etc …”

Posted by Big John on November 22, 2011

Don’t you just hate it when you pick up the mail and find one of those thick brown government envelopes ?

Well, last week I received one. … Oh ! shit … I thought, I bet the tax man thinks that I have some extra cash stashed away somewhere (which of course I don’t) and wants his share, or else he wants a bit more of the pension I slaved and sweated .. grafted .. worked .. pissed about for all my life.

Here we go ! … I thought as I opened the envelope and discovered several pages. I expected to find the usual questionaire about what I had earned since the days of pounds, shillings and pence and what I had spent on travel in the days before motorways and parking meters.

Then I noticed that the covering letter was not from ‘Her Majesty’s Revenue and Customs’, but from ‘The Pensions Service’. The enclosed documents contained bewildering sets of figures regarding the various amounts deducted from my pay over the years as contributions towards my state pension, and the details of how much I had been paid each week since I retired.

OK ! … I said to myself … So how much do they want me to pay back ?  …. and then …

BINGO ! … I suddenly noticed the following … “We will make a payment of £1,616 (approx. $2,500) into your account. This is the money we owe you“.  Yes, the buggers had been under-paying me by about four quid a week since I put my feet up back in 2004.

Now that is not the end of the story, because today I received another brown envelope from the same people informing me that I would receive a further payment of £173 (approx. $250) ..”to cover any loss of use of this money”.

So a good result so far, but I can’t see the blood suckers at Her good old Maj’s Revenue and Customs Dept. letting me get away with it, and that the next brown envelope will probably herald that …

… “the tax man cometh” !


5 Responses to “I bet it’s a case of … “One hand giveth etc …””

  1. Ahh. . .It’s easy to imagine the smiling face of a pub owner upon reading this news.

  2. Grannymar said

    Take a photograph and frame it. Quick!

  3. Ginnie said

    Doesn’t it say a lot about the world we live in that we can’t simply receive a windfall like this and be happy about it? I’d be expecting the “other shoe to fall” too, John. Just can’t trust those government agencies !!

  4. Betty said

    We would say, “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth” about that. Not that we know what the saying means.

  5. Rummuser said

    You lucky fellow you! Now of course you have some extra cash stashed away and you have gone public with that fact too. Be careful Big John. Your fairy God Mother is working over time for you and expects you to be careful.

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