bigjohn

There is many a good tune played on an old fiddle.

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  • My Life and Times

    I was born in 1939 BC. That's 'Before Computers'. Luckily I survived the following events in my life, such as World War II, The London Blitz, Rationing, and worst of all... Archbishop Temple's School.

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    During the mid 1950s I was enjoying Rock 'n' Roll and being a first generation teenager, when suddenly, just like Elvis, I found myself in uniform during 'The Cold War'...and then

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    I became 'a family'. Which meant that I sort of missed the 'swinging sixties', but still managed to look a complete prat in the 70s, just like everyone else.

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    During the 'Thatcher Years' I lost my hair and a lot of people lost a good deal more. My career fluctuated to say the least as I was demoted, promoted, fired and hired a number of times, but still I managed to stagger on into a welcome retirement and to celebrate 50 years of happy marriage.
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Archive for the ‘political’ Category

Does Mel Gibson know what’s going on ?

Posted by Big John on September 16, 2014

Only a couple of days to go before we could see the breakup of the United Kingdom, if the land of the ‘haggis bashers’ becomes an independent country.

To be honest, I couldn’t care less if the majority of ‘Jocks’ north of the border decided that they wanted to rebuild Hadrian’s Wall and make Rod Stewart their head of state.

‘Her Maj’ might be a bit pissed off at not being Queen of Scotland anymore, but I’m sure that the Scots would still allow her and her tribe to stay (hopefully for ever) at her favourite Balmoral Castle, for I’m sure that they would miss the hilarious sight of all that tartan being worn by a bunch of ‘Highland’ …

… Germans and Greeks ! 

Posted in humour, political, rant | 5 Comments »

No more burnt toast !

Posted by Big John on September 3, 2014

In my kitchen I have a small toaster, with just two slots for the bread, and most mornings I have to decide if I want one or two slices of toast for my breakfast.

Now I have just found out that if I only put one slice of bread in the toaster and leave one slot empty I am wasting energy and helping to destroy the planet !

Can you believe that, not content with the ridiculous prohibition on vacuum cleaners, the EU bureaucrats little führers in Brussels have their eyes set on about 30 other electrical items, such as lawn mowers, hairdryers and, Yes ! .. Toasters ! … Not to mention all those brown envelopes stuffed full of Euros being passed under the table.

I recently read that the polar bears are now happy, but the seals (their lunch) are pissed off, because the ice in the artic is not melting: in fact, it is expanding: so all those crappy light bulbs which the EU forced me to buy are a waste of bloody time; as it now seems (well, for the moment) that there is not one shred of scientific evidence that man causes global warming; so, if not ‘man’, who then ? … Well, we know that it’s not those polar bears, but methane farting cows are still a possibility. Or perhaps it is just nature doing …

… what ‘nature’ has always done.

Posted in humour, political, rant | 1 Comment »

Here we go again. – Part Nine

Posted by Big John on August 13, 2014

I ended ‘Part Eight’ with President Obama’s statement … “I don’t rule out anything” ! … and guess what ? .. American warplanes are now shooting the shit out of yet another bunch of very unpleasant religious nutters in ‘Eye-Rack’. Although in this case they are trying their best to save the lives of a people, the Yasidis, of whom we had never heard until a few days ago.

Now we learn that British aircraft are involved, although so far, only in a humanitarian role.

Which brings me to my question … Why is it always the USA and some other western powers who have to try and solve the bloody problems of what is largely the ‘Arab World’ ?

OK, so I know that our own political ‘pygmies’, got this present mess started by naïvely thinking that democracy, human rights and religious freedom actually meant something to all the tribes, sects, political factions, military leaders and assorted crooks and bandits, not to mention every kind of religious loony in this part of the world: but surely it is about time that all the rulers of those oil rich states, and others, stopped counting their money and  flaunting their wealth and started to sort out the problems and help the persecuted people of their own region, and the followers of their own religion ?

I suppose that there isn’t much chance of that, when those now being slaughtered are considered to be ‘infidels’ or just the wrong kind of Muslim.

… Ain’t it great to be religious ?

Posted in political, rant, religion | 5 Comments »

“Don’t worry, it’s only their council tax” !

Posted by Big John on July 12, 2014

Last Sunday I was surprised to find two letters on my doormat, as mail is not usually delivered on a Sunday. They were official looking envelopes bearing Royal Mail stamps and must have come by some sort of ‘special delivery’. One was addressed to me and one to my wife.

Blimey ! .. I thought. This must be really important stuff. In fact they were from the local council’s ‘Electoral Registration Officer’ to advise that .. “The way you register your vote is changing” .. and that .. “you have automatically been re-registered under the new system”. So why bloody bother to waste money telling us and thousands of other people like us ?

OK .. So these local bureaucrats do love to spend our money and this exercise must have cost a few thousand quid: but it didn’t end there !

Today two more ‘official looking’ Royal Mail envelopes appeared on the mat. They contained letters telling us that .. “Unfortunately, there was a mistake” .. in the previous letter. This minor ‘mistake’ did not effect us in any way. So, once again why bother !

The second letter was signed by the same bloke who signed the first one. His error must have cost a few more thousand pounds, but I bet that he his still in his job and is …

… looking forward to his ‘efficiency’ bonus !

Posted in political, rant | 2 Comments »

Here we go again. – Part Eight

Posted by Big John on June 13, 2014

These days it is not possible, in this country, to pick up a newspaper or turn on the TV news without seeing or hearing the words .. Muslim .. Islam .. Sharia Law .. Mosque .. Koran .. etc.

Recently these words have mostly been used in news stories about religion being taught in schools, although why there should be such a fuss made over the ‘brainwashing’ of young children in Islamic schools is beyond me, when the Roman Catholics, Jews and others have been doing it to youngsters for years !

Now the media has suddenly re-discovered the bloody mess that is the Middle East. You know, that part of the world which George Bush and Tony Blair opened up to ‘democracy’, and where the people so benefitted from ‘The Arab Spring’ !

Why has it, once again, hit the headlines ? .. Well, as if .. al-Qaeda .. Jihad .. Boko Haram .. etc. weren’t enough, the press has something new to scare the shit out of us … “ISIS” !

Not a very pleasant bunch of (religious) people ! .. but, then again, you should ‘be careful what you wish for’, when you meddle in matters you know very little about, so let us hope that President Obama (unlike old ‘Dubya’) knows a ‘Shia’ from a ‘Sunni’, when he utters such statements as …

…   “I don’t rule out anything” !

Posted in political, rant, religion | 4 Comments »

Knock twice and ask for Peter.

Posted by Big John on April 28, 2014

Blimey ! … The ex-archdruidbishop of Canterbury agrees with me !

I see that since leaving office someone decided to make him Lord (No! not the ‘Lord’) Williams of Oystermouth (Where do they get these titles ?).

Still, that’s nothing compared to what the Pope has been up to last weekend, as old Frankie has performed one Hell of a spectacular ceremony in Rome canonizing two of his predecessors, Popes John Paul II and John XXIII, which means that they can now pass through the pearly gates as Saints.

Well good for them ! Perhaps when they get in there (I wonder if it’s the same Paradise where all those suicide bombers go ?) they will have a word with the bloke in charge about commanding all his followers back on earth to get out of the habit of…

…   blowing each other to pieces ?

Posted in humour, political, rant, religion | 2 Comments »

Religion ? .. Just tick the box marked ‘C of E’.

Posted by Big John on April 23, 2014

So, unlike Tony Blair, David Cameron does “do God”, and his recent announcement that Britain is a “Christian country” has caused quite an uproar from my fellow atheists and others.

I won’t go into detail on this as the media has this story well covered.

However, with the Anglican Church rapidly disappearing up it’s own cassock, and all the mosques and temples springing up all over the place: not to mention all the other ‘houses of worship’ of every variety of religious nutter on the face of the earth, I find it hard to see how our Dave comes to such a conclusion.

I recently read that The National Offender Management Service, which runs prisons in England and Wales, recognises 18 religions, including Paganism, Jainism, Spiritualism and Zoroastrianism; and that the Rastafari religion (minus the ‘ganja’ smoking) has recently been added to the list, and I’m pretty sure that all those who “get religion” in the ‘nick’ are fairly representative of the other believers in this country.

It has been reported that in the 2011 census 60% of people in this country claimed to be Christian, but I believe that it was 60% of those who “claimed to be religious” who said that they where Christians. Quite a different thing altogether; and only 7% of these people said that they were regular church goers.

I suppose that on this Saint George’s Day it’s OK to remember that we live in what was historically a ‘Christian country’ …

… but it ain’t any more !  

Posted in humour, political, rant, religion | 4 Comments »

“Jesus who ?”

Posted by Big John on April 17, 2014

As a tolerant (?) atheist I am quite happy to see the members of different faiths celebrate their various religious festivals, apart from when the mumbo-jumbo merchants who run these events impose their will on the rest of us: such as insisting that larger shops in England and Wales, by law, must close on Easter Sunday and Christmas Day.

OK, so shutting some shops for a couple of days a year is no big deal, but I’m sure that the zombies who wander around shopping malls every Sunday have no idea why their favourite department store or supermarket will be closed this weekend …

… “The Last Supper ? What’s that all about then ?” … “Crucifixion ? Never ‘erd of it mate !” … “Pontius Pilate ? Who’s ‘e play for ?” … “Gethsemane ? Ain’t that near Benidorm ?” … “The Passion of Christ ? Now that sounds like … a bit of porn to me !”

…   and if you think that I’m kidding … READ THIS !

:-) .. HAPPY EASTER EVERYONE ..  :-)

Posted in humour, political, rant, religion | 3 Comments »

 
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