Vatican secrets revealed !

I had to laugh at Grannymar’s comment on my previous post about the Vatican’s secret documents … “Do you think it was the bill for the Last Supper?”, as I can just imagine the disciples arguing over who ate the most gefilte fish and who had more than their fair share of the chicken soup and matzoh balls !  

Rumour has it that amongst the other documents to be burned on the Pope’s orders are …

1. The pawn ticket for the ‘Holy Grail’.
2. The result of the Virgin Mary’s paternity lawsuit.
3. A receipt from a Bethlehem hotel for an en-suite double room with a crib for the night of 24th December 1 BC.
4. A ‘congratulations on the birth’ card from Herod Antipas and Salome.
5. Lazarus’s death certificate.
6. A copy of an order to a Galilee fish shop for cod and chips x 5,000.
7. A letter to an inn keeper in Cana complaining about the quality of the wine at a recent wedding.
8. A note from someone who signed himself ..”Your faithful friend  J.I. xxx”.. to an unnamed resident of Nasereth telling him not to trust a creep named Simon who calls himself ‘Peter’.
9. A letter from Mary Magdalene telling a friend that she was giving up the day job as she was pregnant and about to marry some carpenter who fancied himself as a bit of a preacher.
10. Pontius Pilate’s report to the Emperor Tiberius that only one person had been crucified recently, a bandit named Barabbas, because some long haired Jewish hippy had sold all the spare timber and nails at a Passover ‘closing down sale’.

I feel that the bill for the last supper must be genuine because although it says at the bottom of the page .. “service not included” .. some waiter has noted …

…   “Large tip from a bloke named Judas” !