“It’s all grease and garlic”.

A few years ago my wife and I were sitting in a little taverna situated in a pretty cove on the Greek island of Corfu.

It was a searing hot lunchtime and we were sitting in the shade enjoying a cold beer and sampling a wonderful assortment of mezes for our lunch: when puffing up the beach came an elderly couple looking as if they were about to drop dead from heat exhaustion. Strangely they did not sit in the shade, but picked a table in the sun. Noel Coward was certainly right about … ‘mad dogs and Englishmen’. 

A young waiter asked if they wanted lunch and they glanced towards our table with it’s spread of tempting little dishes … “We don’t eat foreign food” said the man “Do you have chips (French fries) ?” … “and do you have onions ?” asked his wife. The waiter nodded.  “Then that’s what we’ll have please … chips with RAW onions !”

I often wonder why some people travel abroad if, like the couple at the taverna, they … ‘don’t eat foreign food’.

Indian and Chinese food is very popular in Britain and my local ‘chippy’ sells pizza and kebabs as well as the traditional fish ‘n’ chips: but when it comes to eating out abroad, the same people who queue up for a ‘chicken tikka masala’, still demand steak and kidney pie when sunning themselves on the Costa Blanca: and as for … ‘garlic bread’ !

I was once dining in a pleasant little restaurant in Paris where the food was excellent but simple; when a large lady from Yorkshire at the next table screamed … “Eee! I can’t eat that !” … I looked at her plate on which was a small steak and some ’fries’. After much fuss the waiter removed the offending meal. It seemed that a few herbs had been sprinkled on the steak which had transformed it into, in the lady’s own words, ’foreign muck’.    

I love France and French cuisine, so after my recent trip, my fridge and freezer are stuffed with all sorts of goodies, not to mention the cases of wine stacked in the garage: so this evening I think that I will have … Coquille Saint-Jacques, followed by Blanquette de Veau a l’ancienne with Pommes Sautees a la Provencal. To finish I fancy Clafoutis aux Cerises and maybe a little Pont-L’Eveque cheese if I can manage it.

Bugger it !  …

….  We’ve run out of tomato ketchup !